Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Zombie Apocalypse:.. Are you Ready?

Me: have you ever shot a gun? humm is the correct thing to say "fired a gun?"

Jai: "Shot a gun" nope, never done it. Paintball....yes. Never even held a real firearm.

Me: neither have I....some friends want to go to a firing range though. I can see it being fun for about 5 minutes. i'm not a fan of guns though

Jai: I'm indifferent. I think I want to go to a gun range, and get to know how to use a firearm. More in the name of self-defense and survival than a fascination with firearms. if the zombies come, I don't want to fiddle with aiming, or a safety switch on my gun I pulled off a dead cop.

Me: yeah...exactly. we must be prepared for that day


Me: paint balls aren't gonna do the trick

Jai: Last night's game reminded me how prepared I should be.

Me: i think i would die quickly in a zombie apocalypse. not in the phase when ppl still don't know what's going on..but when it comes time for hand to hand...i think i will get bitten or scratched. so knowing goal is to stay completely sheltered..

Jai: Holing up in a house and waiting it out, eh?

Me: and when i need to emerge for food and supplies...i will wear extra padding that may slow me down a bit. I think I would prefer a machete to a gun unless it can be a machine you can picture me walking around the streets swinging a machete about with pillows strapped to my body and wearing a helmet and would be also nice to have a tank

Jai: LOL!!! See, I would wear like.... 3 or 4 sweat shirts, 3 pairs of jeans (one of them carharts) and at least one pair of wool socks... Then gloves... and a neck protector... and then some kind of motorcycle helmet.... and a mechanic's suit over it all. I don't care what you are... can't scratch me... can't bite me. pillows are....impractical, but hilarious.

Me: lol..just thinking of what I may have that's I stray too far from shelter..I'll always have a pillow. what would you use for neck protector? I was thinking of a neck brace but it would be difficult to have that and a helmet on at the same time

Jai: I would make a denim, plastic-lined one from scratch. It would have to spread under my shirt, and up my face to some degree so that it couldn't be pulled away, and I don't know anything right now that does that which isn't military spec.

Me: well sounds like you'll definitely be ready and I will be some bootleg MacGyver wannabe that will be zombie food within 3-5 weeks of the apocalypse.

Jai: who knows... my house sucks to fortify, so I would have to run for it, and fortify somewhere else.... I could be swarmed easily.

Me: we must make a fortified treehouse...we haven't come up with a consensus on zombie behavior when it comes to heights at my daily work lunch discussions about the zombie apocalypse. We do agree that IF they can climb, they are poor climbers.

Jai: I think, after turning, they loose motor function quickly... only the most recently turned would be able to climb at all. As the apocalypse wore-on, those types would dwindle in numbers. I don't think a tree fort is the best idea.... if you get overrun, you have no where to escape to.

Me: true but the likelihood of being overrun high in a tree is low. Also gravity is a free weapon as you can knock them off and have the fall take care of them.

Jai: yeah, but they would amass at the base of the trees as soon as they discovered you... it would make escape for supplies much more difficult than it's worth.

Me: you don't think they would give up after awhile if I stay quiet and still?

Jai: nope. they KNOW there is food up there. they would just hang out and wait for the food to come. even if they starved in the process. god forbid you drop any kind of meat, or make ANY noise.... it would only renew their interest 100 fold.

Me: good point...i'll reserve the tree as a last case scenario type of thing

Jai: well…. that's the problem too... you would have to have it as a plan WAY in advance, since building it among all the zombies would be SO dangerous with a group of less than 7 people.

Me: oh of course. i just need to get my hands on a tank....

Jai: LOL. get an APC.... faster, more agile, same armor, and uses less gas.

Me: wooo! you just helped me to survive an extra 2 weeks

Jai: Well, you GOTTA! I mean, it'll take me a while to fight my way to Atlanta to rescue you.

Me: ok you have 7 weeks...tops

Jai: LOL. you need to make it at least 4 months. Give me some time to amass supplies and weapons... get a crew... and then get on a roll.

Me: 4 months!!!...I'll be lucky to get past month 3...I'll do my best

Jai: keep in mind... if you've turned when I get there... you're going down in a head-splodey kinda't.

Me: point taken

No comments:

Post a Comment